Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Please Lord, I Really Don't Want An Orange Jumpsuit.

I am so ready for vacation.

Either I get the hell out of Dodge or various acts of mayhem will occur.

Let's just list the highlights, shall we ?

1. I did not go to school to become as obsessed as some of the co-workers that I have to tolerate with regards to the status/operational function or tidiness of the womens fucking bathroom on my floor. Contrary to popular belief, that is NOT listed in my job description, not even loosely falling under the umbrella of " duties as deemed necessary ".  I can and do send the property management an email with a service request as needed.
Not a big deal.

However , even after 30 + years here , these entitled , shrews with all the warmth and compassion of Elizabeth Bathory seem to feel a God given compulsion to continuously come up to me to report, advise , question and discuss the problem de jour in graphic terms...again and again and again and again and again.



The property management has been alerted. It will be attended to .

AND...................NO, I DO NOT KNOW WHEN !

And you wonder about my attitude ?

2. The conference room situation. Now this is a part of my actual job, riding herd on meeting space and scheduling same  . In  the past this has been a no brainer. But as we become busier ,  since there are only 4 rooms  available on this floor at any given time , the possibility that you will in fact be able to use a room for your bullshit birthday breakfast/cake/geedunk decreases proportionately. Do not bristle if I politely ask which attorney, number of people involved and so on. Two of the rooms are smaller than the others. I try to accomodate your actual needs with space available. Booking a room at the lunch hour for you and your BFF's to eat your lunch because after all , you are not only special but also deserving of this boon...HELL NO. These rooms are dedicated to actual CLIENT MEETINGS .The kind the attorneys can BILL for . You know..that pesky little procedure that generates OUR PAYCHECKS ?  Not to mention that it is widely known that cleaning up and or removing your beverage cup/glasses and removing your food debris....is after all beneath you....AIN'T MY PROBLEM BITCH. I doubt a client would appreciate the aroma of BBQ or what ever noxious aromas linger long after you have begrudgingly tromped back to your desk at the cube farm as you pine for Prince Charming to take you away from all of this splendour.

In other news............

Why do people think it is permissible to interrupt others when the former sees the latter quietly reading on their own property ? It never fails. You get to the best part of the chapter and here they come. ....and I was raised right. I close the book and give my attention to my guests . I would'nt  mind half as much if they would occasionally ask if then was a good time to walk over..but then knowing me  , I would agree out of politeness regardless of what I was doing....

See what I mean ?

I need a drink, a nap, a cupcake and out of here...not necessarily in that precise order.

At least SU has the common sense to know when to give me space when I am stressed ...

Aunty Pol