Thursday, December 04, 2008

Dear Santa

Aunty Pol

Tuesday, November 25, 2008


EXPLAINING ECONOMICS WITH COWS..( Courtesy of Blog d'Ellison and Houston Steve)

SOCIALISM You have 2 cows. You give one to your neighbor.

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and gives you some milk.


You have 2 cows. The State takes both and sells you some milk.

You have 2 cows. The State takes both and shoots you.

You have 2 cows. The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.


You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull. Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the income.


You have two giraffes. The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

You have two cows. You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows. Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead.

You have two cows. You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The public then buys your bull.

You have two cows. You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you want three cows.

You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image called “Cowkimon” and market it worldwide.

You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.

You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch.

You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count them again and learn you have 2 cows. You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.

You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you. You charge the owners for storing them.

You have two cows. You have 300 people milking them. You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity. You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

You have two cows. You worship them.

You have two cows. Both are mad.


Everyone thinks you have lots of cows. You tell them that you have none. Nobody believes you, so they bomb the shit out of you and invade your country. You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of Democracy.

You have two cows. Business seems pretty good. You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

You have two cows. The one on the left looks very good.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Congratulations Officer B.A.L.

Congratulations Sweetie, we are so very proud of you.
Have a great weekend.
Aunty Pol

Friday, November 14, 2008

If You Think I Am That Stupid Or Inept..You Are Sadly Mistaken .

I Will Catch You Every Time.

Consider Yourself Warned.

' Nuff Said

Have a great weekend.


Aunty Pol

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

It's been , well yeah that ..

It's been an odd couple of days here of late at the Casa.

Like many other businesses, SU's has begun to lay some meat sacks off. And by that , I mean that either hours have been cut for those who have no business being there at all and so forth , or they are just gone, Baby , gone.

Yes, it has been tense here.

Hisself , Gaia bless him is one of those who being of a certain age, know the full value of a real days work for a paycheck. He understands the give and take and the obligation one owes an employer, but he has only been there for 2 1/2 years and we all know how that goes.

The hard part is that he really loves this gig and wishes that he had found this 25 + years ago .

I am trying not to worry....FAIL !

Oh well....

On the lighter side, my youngest brother now age 48 is wearing glasses..( LMAO ..welcome to the club dear ) and seems to have finally grown up a bit. He and SU played golf last weekend and he came by....and the world did not end. He has the aches and pains we all have and has learned the value of civil discourse .

We chatted.

I told him that I am now at a place in my life where I no longer choose to participate in the arguements, and the angst. I will live my life as I see fit and it is what it is.

While there are issues with others, I have embraced live and let live, do not F with me and we will be fine.

It's just easier.

We aren't the Waltons .

Have a great rest of the week and weekend


Aunty Pol

Friday, November 07, 2008

Below is just one of the e mails that I have gotten at the office in the last 2 days.

McCain Lawyer Impeach Obama!McCain has reached an agreement with the Obama lawyers that makes Obama resignation effective November 11. Barack Obama can lost President's Chair. McCain video report 7 November:Proceed to the election results news page>>2008 USA Government Official Web

The other one is below :

McCain Lawyer Impeach Obama!McCain has reached an agreement with the Obama lawyers that makes Obama resignation effective November 11. Barack Obama can lost President's Chair. McCain video report 7 November:Proceed to the election results news page>>2008 USA Government Official Web Site

The first one came from :

The second came from :

Now granted, the above jpeg is one that I ran across and it made me smile. Anyone that knows me knows that I am a huge fan of : and that we are cat people at Casa de Swamp.

What is rather bothersome about these is that to someone less familiar with the the internet and the World Wide Web , ( Thanks again CERN)..they appear legit.

What sad , stupid bullshit .

Have a great weekend.


Aunty Pol

Wednesday, November 05, 2008


I for one am grateful to the Deity of my choice that this malarky is all over. It has been a hell of a long 2 years people.

I do have to say that the concession speech I heard From John McCain last night was thoughtful, sincere , and I walked away with the opinion that if he had been able to deliver that sort of speech during the campain , the outcome might have been different.


Who I voted for is not the issue, and no ones business but my own .

But I voted.

I do know more than one person who decided not to vote and at first , this really bothered the beejeebus out of me, and then I realized that that is also a choice. There have been elections where I have basically voted for the lesser of 2 evils...not this time..but it has happened and I think that for a lot of us , this option is no longer one we can live with. So I do in my own way get it.

I am more concerned about 2 wars, and the economy than who wears what and the breed of puppy our new President is going to get for his young daughters. I would hope that they consider adopting a puppy from the SPCA or better yet a no kill shelter.

At least it's over.

Have a good week.


Aunty Pol

Monday, November 03, 2008

Election Day in Canada
"I am a Canadian, a free Canadian, free to speak without fear, free to worship God in my own way, free to stand for what I think right, free to oppose what I believe wrong, free to choose those who shall govern my country. This heritage of freedom I pledge to uphold for myself and for all mankind." Prime Minister John G. Diefenbaker, from the House of Commons, Debates (on the Canadian Bill of Rights), July 1, 1960.

Say what you want ...The Canadian's have it more right than wrong .



Aunty Pol

Monday, October 27, 2008

I Wonder What She's Going To Be This Year ?

I wonder what the costume will be for this year....!

Have a great week .


Aunty Pol

Sunday, October 26, 2008



I know we all love our babies , but this is just WRONG !!!!!


Aunty Pol

This is what I miss this time of year.

A true Autumn.

It's been a lovely weekend....we were slugs more or less. I did the usual laundry bit and hisself did some home maint . we needed so all in all it was good. I did not try to do a lot in the yard as I have hurt my back again and have to really be careful. It's old and all of that , but there you are. It's gotten worse as the P2 makes it's progress and I know that I cannot change it, it is what it is. It just rather pisses me off since it always seems that what ever is in bloom right now looks so vibrant and I want to go play . The hydrangeas are sporting a lot of new growth as are the ornamental peppers and everyone is just popping out.


The kittehs are all frisky, we can barely get Sgt. Panda Pants and his sisser Miss Gracie Marie in the house...but for the bribes they would never come in when it's like this...glad they are happy campers. Even the puppys next door are extra " PLAY PLAY PLAY " ....they are sooo cute when they all get together and run the fence line.

Not much else....I re-scheduled jury duty for Halloween..intentionially....if I have to be there , I might as well be entertained.

Have a great week.


Aunty Pol

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Rock On Harris County...39,000 People Early Voted Yesterday.
Yes indeed, people got up , got going and got to voting early.
I may lose things around the house , I mean really, who hasn ' t...but I always know where the voter registration cards are, right on the fridge by the photo of Daddy and Mary....We are die hard get out and rock the vote people and while I won't say who I am voting for..nunya people..seriously people...nunya bidness...I walk the circuitous path at the is enough that we vote.
Other than that, it has been a dull week...the mission this week is to acquire a new crock pot. The one we have is more than 30 years old , and only good for keeping Queso hot...Jacque Penny has a 6 1/2 qt Hamilton Beach programmable with my name on it...Pot Roast here I come.
The kittehs are all happy and healthy is not completely dire.
Have a great rest of the week ...
Aunty Pol

Monday, October 20, 2008

Been one of those Mondays...I will finish the previous post when it is not a day like today.
The above is my current screen saver at the office and it is the only thing that has made me smile.
Have a better week..
Aunty Pol

Friday, October 17, 2008

I know , I know

I know that it's been a while , but trust me , there has been a hell of a lot going on bear with me.
Lets start with IKE.
I chose to move here and I have to say that it is in the top five all time best decisions that I have ever made. When I left the South ( Virginia to be exact) for the left Coast , I was both young and dumb, newly married and of the opinion that it would be an adventure. Bear in mind this was pre Twin Peaks and all those other shows that showed the Pacific Northwest as Nirvana. Doom on me for loving Here Come The Brides.
To say it was awful is such an understatement that it would take this whole blog and I would be in tears by the end of it. Other than my best friend, her husband, my Godson and his bride...there isn't a thing I would go back for ....not now, not ever infinity and beyond.
And Best Friend says that " Dear, you've always been southern."
What a nice thing to say.
And how true.
Granted, I have lived through other hurricanes, Alicia in 1983 comes to mind...but I was younger , stupider and in an apartment.
IKE scared the crap out of us.
Yes, Rita and Katrina were as bad as we all remember.
That MOFO IKE's wall was 450 miles across.
More Later

Monday, September 08, 2008

Katz - Part Two

Sorry for the delay kids...not that all y'all care one way or the other, nor should you ..just being polite and all.

As stated earlier, the katz are highly spoiled and placate the 'rents by acting as if they in fact understand what we say..yes, we are that delusional. This includes , but is not limited to :


Not for kitty

It's not Caturday

Stop ( fill in the blank)

You get the idea. They all have their favorites as far as the treats ( Temptations) go and I of course am expected to remember the order , the preference and cater to the whim of those with four on the floor. Yeah, the person who occasionally forgets where she put her debit card, ( shut it dear, I can hear you , even from the office ) , is supposed to remember that if the triplets had chiggin yesterday.. no repeats.

Andy and Gracie Marie however are not picky..they like the fact that they might get to hoover more since the trips can snub ....TREATS.

That is the irony...they are treats....not the usual IAMs kibble in the bowls.


I've seen toddlers less picky.


It appears that Ike may try to spank us this week. I feel badly for those poor souls in Haiti . It's not like they had a pot to piss in before the storms imitated Sherman marching through Georgia..they just lave less than zero now. It appears that Ike is headed this way and won't make landfall till the end of the week , unless he gains speed. I don't know if at this point with the fourth real storm situation in the last month or so that we are all a tad weary about it, but there us a lot of Meh about the whole thing. Whine all you want to , panic you noobs ( when in danger , when in in circles...scream and shout....thanks Daddy..that still makes me chuckle.) or check the pantry and realize that it's gonna do what ever the hell it wants to...period.

The NG , Ms Jeri's folks are in from Thibideaux . The whole Houma- Thib area got smacked pretty good and her folks generator blew so they are gonna be here a while . The Crazy Cajun's people left NOLA for Atlanta and such..hello I guess we will look at the larder and go to Kroger...with everyone else.


Other than that , it's been fairly quiet of late. I made the SU suffer through an old movie we got in from NetFlix...a very old movie. I remember it as being better than it was . Of course , I haven't seen it in 30 odd years and am a self admitted fan of " Night if the Lepus ." . Anyhoo, if you are in the mood, invite some friends over, grab Scooby Snax and the beverage ( adult or otherwise of your choice ) and play MST3K with...Drum Roll Please....

" The Long Ships" staring Richard Widmark, Sidney Poitier , Russ Tamblyn and Oskar Homolka and Lionel Jefferies.

Discuss the following:

Poitier's theft of James Brown's hair.
Lionel Jefferies gay Eunuch in the harem raid..good times.
The choreography of the above harem raid.
The prologue.
What a nimble lil thing Russ Tamblyn was..eeesh.

Granted , I am a fan of " Flash Gordon " staring Buster Crabbe , the Marz Brothers..even Zeppo and the above mentioned " Night Of The Lepus " ( you want that bar b qued bunny to go ? Hee).. may be a while before i hear the end of this.

This film is right up there with " Joe vs The Volcano".

Oh well..on the other hand , " The Last Legion " with Colin Firth and Ben Kingsly wasn't bad at all and happy happy joy joy..Alton Brown's " Feasting On Waves " premiered last night......wheeeee.

Have a safe week.


Aunty Pol

Monday, September 01, 2008

No..They Are Not At All Spoiled

I am always amazed that the six pack have so quickly become spoiled in their own individual ways.

I am a wimp. SO is hisself to a lesser degree.

They are all rescues...literally.

Munchkin ( Nee Nee Puddins, Munchie Poo Poo) came from VAP at Petsmart , along with the late and sorely missed Jakey J. She now sleeps on the pillow , next to me and fusses if she does not have turn down service. This is the girl who as a kit drank from the master bath tap ala " Esther Williams ". She now demands and...sorry to say...gets.....fresh " Sparkley Clean " water twice a day in her bowl. She also whines for cat nip and hs been relegated to " Caturday night " on the nip rug. I am not hoovering every night. She bitches when I am not ready for bed by 10 p.m. so I think she is channeling Peaches.

Lord , I miss my Piggy.

She had me trained.

Ten p.m....bed time Momma.....Yes M'am.

more to follow

Saturday, August 30, 2008

Vacay's Are Wonderful

Vacations are wonderful , even if they are not what you originally intended .

When you live in the Gulf Coast area , you pay attention to the weather God's.

Or you die.

Simple as that.

Hisself and I had planned our usual, which got cancelled for various reasons. No biggie , down here you take steps to compensate for that.

I , however stayed home .

And had the best time.

I have never been a " housewife " .

I didn't marry a house .

I do however, relish the time to have to be able to do things at the Casa .

On my own terms.

I did take the time to phone/e mail my best friends, get caught up , so all is good.

I also took the time to make some decisions with regards to others that will ultimately work out all the better for me .

Now....if we'd just won the lottery.................yeah...I know .

Blessed Be ,


Aunty Pol

Sunday, July 27, 2008

Definately Different

It's been an odd week .

We finally got some rain at the Casa, sorely needed from Dolly. All over town , everyone but us got rain , and I do mean everyone . We finally got some at the house on Thursday, and of course as par for the course, I had been fighting sinus's to the point that by Thursday I had a full blown migraine.

Not much that can be done there but just get through it.

Work that day was completely out of the question . It was the " Pray For Death" kind of thing , so I called in and went back to bed.

Here is the thing.

I have been having some very disturbing dreams lately.

Disturbing as in the " You are dead or no longer able to hurt / beat/ harm me and in one part of my mind I know this , but.....

Waking up fearful , not rested....wondering why the F after X number of years is this happening is to say the least difficult.

My main focus is fighting the panic attacks and the anxiety attacks right now.

Why ?

Why Now ?

We are good at home, nothing new or traumatic..just our lil old boring selves...

So .

Why ?

Have a happy week.

Ciao .

Aunty Pol .

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Busy Bees

I went to my other Godson's wedding last weekend , out in Washington state and just had about the best fun that is allowed by law. I have known the child's parents for over 30 years, we went to school and worked together so this was a super special treat for ol Pol here. We had tried to keep it a secret , LMAO, but the kids figured it out. I was set to shoot the pair of them , the program listed Moi as " Honored Guest" and the twerp walked me down the aisle first..great way to not make me if.

His mother and I were in tears from almost the moment I got off the plane and stayed that way for much of the 5 days that I was there. I'd forgotten how dry the climate is on the eastern half of the state . My skin went matter how much moisture spackle I slathered on when time permitted...yikes.....time for a facial.

Funny, when there is a wedding, the bride has eleventy bazillion gal pals to help hold her up....the grooms folks...Me. We worked out tails off for this " country " wedding with over 300 guests. Some of the funniest were the tux fittings and the hilarity there....OMG....Hey Abner..nice touch that with the white sox......hubba hubba Baby.

The wedding was at the grandparents farm, and this is no slouch of a farm is $15.00 a bushel....may want to check the perimeter....we threw a bunch of that shit. Luckily, the wedding wasn't in August, between harvest and the fact that after harvest it is so dry and depressing to look at , not to mention how stubble fires wreak ones sinuses...yup...I still remember at bit from living on the alfalfa ranch in Touchet. The wheat fields , alfalfa and the peas were all so green and lush...just wonderful. The rehearsal dinner was fun...lots of nerves and goofiness.

Wedding Day .

Why the hell Jimmy Olson , cub reporter had the entire bridal party and family there 5 ( FIVE ppl....FIVE) hours for photo's before the wedding escapes me.

Word of the day....Hydrate....pass the Desani stat.

My kidneys are still floating and I drink a hell of a lot of water as it is.

Yes, I submitted with grace to the photo thingy.

Anyone who knows me at all knows that I hate , loathe and detest having my picture taken. I have NEVER seen a good one of me. I am just one of those unfortunates that does not take a good matter who is doing it. But for my Godson, I will endure with a smile.

His Mom, Grandmother and I cried through the whole damn thing . And the receiving line was worse, thank God I didn't have to stand in that. OMG , how she and I cried, and I suspect her mate was sniffing too....admit it big were.

The whole process was sooo sweet, we bailed about 11: 30 and the kids were dancing till 4: 30 a.m. I had a lot of offers to dance, but gave that up ages ago, even the slow ones.....except for " Cotton Eyed Joe"'s the law peeps.....gotta do it.

The next day was back to the farm to watch the kids open their gifts...quite a nice two are off to a great start .

The grooms parents and I did have a chance to visit , worth more than I can say. We only get to see each other every few years but e mail daily. I miss them both sooooo much , I could cry.

She and I finally got the chance to talk about a topic that is difficult.

She and her hubs knew/suspected what the ex was doing to me, saw the marks and black eyes and so on...and have felt guilty all these years that they didn't step up. I told her that I was honestly afraid that her hubs would have killed my exaggeration there and I couldn't take that chance. family didn't know for a very long time. I told her that I regretted that my sense of shame got the upper hand on my self respect at that point, but I'd go through most of it again to end up here . They adore the current hubs and he and the grooms daddy are more alike than anyone could have predicted.....pretty damn scary.

That conversation freed me in so many ways. It validated the events and showed me that one can still survive.

I love them both more than they will ever, ever know.

Back here at the Casa..

The kitchen turned out so pretty with the new paint, flooring and stuff that I am almost giddy over it.

His job moved locations the day of the wedding so it worked out that I wasn't here ..poor dude. His boss is still nuts over the stress of the whole thing but that is par. SU is still working insane hours but is willing to do what is needed.

Have a great week....I will post pics of the shindig when I can.


A very tired Aunty Pol

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

" Sometimes You're The Windshield...."

Mary Chapin Carpenter most certainly had it right when she wrote that song.

Don't faint on me here.

While I am not per say a fan of country music, I do like some, and her work is part of that.

It's been like that at the Casa...One step forward and two steps back. No, I am not saying that we are unique, special or any of that fatuous drivel. I am simply saying that this is the state of things right now and while they are not new, I am Frakking Tired Of This .

It's not the big things, he and I can and do step up to the plate and deal with it. We are adults.

It's the small shit.

$720.00 for a new compressor for Pearl the Wonder Car.


Seven Hundred and Twenty Dead Presidents.

And it will be more if the garage door opener is not in the box of mis-placed openers at Enterprise....yeah.

We live in Houston.



Of course all this happens when he is due to go out of town for a three day weekend to Austin with the Moron to play golf. Then , the second week of July I am going to the west coast to attend the other Godson's wedding. The weekend of the wedding, the Moron is also painting our kitchen and new flooring is going in , so of course we have to pack out the whole damn thing and he's gonna be gone this weekend....As I tote boxes home. And to top all of this off, the day of the wedding , his office is moving into the new building so his boss is completely and utterly batshit over it.

ADHD much ?

If I was going to be home the weekend of July 12'th , I"d run away....far , far, far, far, away.

The cost of the car repairs mean that the new hardware for the kitchen will have to wait, and we have a lot of it...don't ask...I did the numbers.

On the up side..the summer law clerks are gone.

Down side, two women that are attorneys at our firm are going on personal sabbaticals..and I will miss them very much. I have made a point of telling them this...and how much I sincerely wish them the best of all things possible.

Please Lord...RAIN naow ????

Please...we are ten inches down..and this is getting very , very old. Other parts of the city..yeah...afternoon sprinkles at least.

Casa = Zero.

Sigh .

Have a great weekend...I will be packing cookbooks and can goods.


Aunty Pol

P.S....It's official. Hisself has lost his mind. He is surfing between " Deadliest Catch on TLC , ( I think ) and " I Survived A Japanese Game Show " on ABC .


Monday, June 16, 2008

Thirty Three

Originally posted : 6/16/08

Thiry Three

Some years are less worse than others.

Some years are gaping , gunshot wounds to the heart .

Today is more the latter than the former , and I cannot give a reason, it simply is.

Maybe it's the fact that ALL of my girlfriends are grandmothers now.


Sometimes I wonder the way life would have been different. I don't know what kind of parent I would have made , there are no rule books. I know for a fact that there are some things that would have been different, some things that would not have stood the light of day. I klnow that this is the one thing that I wanted more than anything else in the world, and that I will bear the guilt intil my last breathe . In my mind I know the fall was an accident..but my heart will never be able to accept that .

I also know that I owe it to them to carry on .

Happy Birthday my babies, your Mother misses you each and every day.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Three Weeks

Its been three weeks now since the MIL was 911 to the hospital.

First thing.." Oh it will be 4 1/2 hrs in surgery..HAH !

They crack her chest and see that the pericarduim has collapsed against the heart itself.


All 5 valves are blocked.

Due to the amounts of previous cancer treatment...there is scar tissue on the heart itself.

Suprise !!!!!!!

They worked on three valves, the three worst I assume..and it's anyones guess from here.

She's in rehab now or Boot Camp as we call it and she is pissed.

You have to know her to know how bizarre that is.

Pop is worn out.

As are their kids.

In many ways , our sense of time has changed . A lot of other things have changed too..or have appeared to. I have gone through this with him and I find it interesting to see the change of roles.....The family member goes utterly bat frakkin shit...admitted or not. The other person must go into the sane mode. We have developed this strategy over 20 years and no longer are aware that we in fact do this. A few years ago on vacation, we had car probs and Hisself just lost it ( yes you did Dear...I have witnesses..!) I was the calm one going.." We can fix this...chill." One of us is allowed to freak out...the other must maintain . We trade works .

This whole thing has blindsided us.

Real life discussions we all avoid are now common fodder.

Priorities that were concepts are now in place..

I find that I am not as apt to react to shit as I might have been. My boundaries are in tact, the people that need to know do. Others's not really an issue I feel the need to inflict upon them.

I have learned over the last year the value of private space..and for that I am grateful . I have separated the fantasy from reality and I find I quite like it.

We're hanging in there.


Aunty Pol.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

And The Other Shoes Drops - Update

It seems that there is a new complication, according to the surgeon .Because of the non - Hodgekins, MIL has had the maximum radiation that her body will tolerate. Between that and the chemo, she is no longer really able to walk , much less stand.

Part of the recovery period with a by pass is getting the patient up and moving about...forcing circulation to get back where is needs to be.

Which she cannot do .

They are not sure they can actually do the bypass and we won't know more till the surgeon talks to the radiologist.


Frak if we know.

Sigh .

Friday, April 25, 2008

And the other shoe drops



Heart Monitors going bat shit

Heart function - 25%

Quad or more bypass eminent.

Husband nuts..given



Deja Vu..again

Friday, April 18, 2008

Happy Frakkin Friday Peeps

Whew. What a week.

We have survived the dreaded Gorgon of 4/15/08. Thank You Lord, Thank You Jeebus .

Things that we /I have also done this week :

March Of Dimes: Walk for the Bebe's:

Every year , for various charities the offices does the pay $5 and you too can wear your beegee's..( No..Not The Brother's not go there ....I AM fan girl) . Mumble years ago , we had " Casual Friday . "



As always, SOME people abused it. Shit I wouldn't wear to work in the garden abuse. So of course the PTB's said " Oh , HELL no."

That ended.

Then we went to Bidness Casual.

Same Nightmare even amplified.

Some PPL just do not get it .

We have now a policy that on a three day weekend, the Friday thereof we can wear BG's . Since I stopped wearing suits/street length skirts four years ago and wear pants or a long skirt , this is no big whoop to me.

When we do a charity thingy, if you pay the fiver, you can wear jeans on a non holiday Friday.


As in the implication of a given CHOICE.

As always, the lame, inept, small minded jive ass mofo's bitched ad nauseum about having to pay said fiver to wear BG's. Thus negating the concept of......wait for it....wait....wait.....


What evs.

The SC ladies baked cupcakes to sell for a buck a throw to raise more monies. At approx. 2:45 there were still a combined total of 40 left. I suspect more grousing.." I have to pay a fiver to wear jeans and a buck for a cupcake ...ummm...NO."

This is for a CHARITY people.

So my main partner in Crime, Sistah of my heart and another attorney no less bought all the thrice damn'd cupcakes and sent an e mail.

" Cupcakes are paid for now thus free.......Enjoy ."

My e mail would NOT have been so nice.

Tomorrow: Shrimp....Nuff said.

Have a great weekend.


Aunty Pol

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Once again 4/15 is OVER Peeps

Thank You Jeebus .

It was really rather mild today as the years go...which means the rest of the week will be a biotch as clients panic with the expected " I forgot this , that , or the other.

Suck it up and deal.

If SU and I can go to slammin Sammy's and buy can you.

I know, I work where I work and I fully expect that the Corp .stuff will go on with's the individuals that I work with and who in fact know better that make me all GRRRRRRRRRR. You people are all e'd up about the incentive check from the guv'ment...LMAO.

1. It's not free money dimwit. You will be taxed on it.
2. You have to file a return to get your greedy mitts on it.

I plan on using it and alas, a tad more to replace the central hear/air indoor unit..yup. Living Large Baby.


Memo :

To: The Bricks and Mortar Retail Wonks .

From : A Middle Aged Woman With Money To Spend .

Re: WTF Over ??????????????

Dear Sir or Madame,

Please pull your heads out of the posterior orifices that humans all possess.

I spent more time than was necessary this past Saturday trying to find a new blazer or two. I work in Corporate America. I am over the age of 50 . I have money to spend. This should not be a quest . This should be a given, a staple of your inventory.

While you pander to the twenty somethings that are a size 2, here on Earth in the real world, most of us are not that person. We don't buy trends. We buy the best quality that we can afford in what ever retail shop we frequent and we are the customer base you routinely ignore.

YOU have decided that the current trend of 70's fashion is the way to go.

YOU are so frakkin wrong , I can't see straight.

1. Loud Prints : Been there, worn that.

2. Short Swing Jackets : Are you stoned or stupid ? No one over the age of 21 , weighing more than 100 lbs dripping wet can carry that off.

3. Arm Holes : When you cut them down towards the lower half of the rib cage, well....Not all of us buy the $45 Vickies secret what ever bra. We were raised that undergarments are called under for a reason...not to be seen.

4. Pants : Don't get me started.

It took me an hour and a half and 3 clerks, my age by the way to find what I needed.

I have the money , you idiots .

I no longer have the patience.

Rant over.


Aunty Pol

Monday, April 14, 2008

It's Been A While.....again

The last few weeks have been say the very least. As is my custom, I take the week of my birthday off. Thankfully, we had decent weather ( ie. no rain) so I could clean all of the carpets, do a real spring cleaning. I have worked all my adult life with no real time off except for the time I was post op in 1986 after a hysterectomy..thank you Lord for that one so I really value the time.

Give me a BSG Marathon and I will be the cleaning-est MOFO you will ever meet.

On more than one level .

For me, 2008 is the Year Of The Edit.

I have edited a lot.

Closets cleaned out for charity.

Shoes given a new forever home.

My emotional and mental sanity.

Blogs I just don't care to read anymore.

Judgemental folk who feel so entitled that they are convinced that they have more than a pound of flesh coming to them.

The shrill, the strident, the vicious, the just plain mean folk out there who are so involved in their dramas that it consumes them.

They have my sympathy, but no longer my tolerance, patience or audience.

I am stronger , happier, saner and just a nicer person for the self house cleaning.

I no longer view my life as either a contest or something to make amends over.

It was a great vacay.

SU..I really am not angry with you. You understand the issue .

As always sweetie, we cool , and I still love you .

Peace out.


Aunty Pol

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Oh My.....It Has Been A While

I have been remiss in posting.

I had no idea it's been a few weeks, there has been a lot going on but still...sheesh.

Where to begin..this will be rather random to the people in the know here so bear with me.

I hate spring.

I love spring.

Under the hate column : I hate being sick with sinus and allergies. It has been almost 2 months now and it's getting rather tiresome . I am tired of feeling puny, where every motion or idea is almost too much to bear. I hate the ringing in my ears when the sinus's back up so bad I also get vertigo . I hate the yellow sheen that every outdoor surface has and the feeling that it's on my skin, in my hair and in the house. I hate now that the weather is nicer and the light is longer that I have to pace my exposure. I want to dig in the dirt. I hate that we lost 5 roses due to the winter. I HATE SLUGS>!

Under the love column : I love the look of the 2 yards of mulch over all of the beds, thank you for the birthday gift dear, I really do appreciate it. I love the fact that the Hydrangeas didn't all die and how the latest one looks in the front bed. I love that the plumbago is coming back and that Andy Panda Pants is a happy camper. I love that for a tiny window, the weather here is decent and I won't die from the heat ..even though after 26 years , I have adapted and bitch less.
I look forward to the ice house re-opening and lazy Saturday nights with the gals, listening to music and just talking friend to friend. I love watching Andy and Gracie Marie chasing bugs.

Onward :

My mother in law is fine after the lumbar fusions, poor thing is holding her own, we are holding our breathe. It is what it is. My step mother has had her hands full with a damaged fence in the back yard and termites, but if anyone can kick their tiny money's on her. She is doing well and stays busy so I am happy for that. Every year the Christmas gift thing gets more challenging for her , so with her blessing , we make donations to the USO and Doctors Without Borders.

We are coming to terms with the loss of a dear friend and co-worker, too early, far too young . The office is what it is and no longer really bugs me as much. I ignore the politics and bullshit, and value my friends all the more for all the years we've hung in there.

I am trying to be a better corespondent to friends and family and feel better for that , it is after all a two way street , and I have been really awful at it.

Hisself is making me crazy still....ah marriage..but this year we hit 20 and I find it easier to stay silent when I would have said something thus prolonging the whatever.

All in all...not bad...not bad at all.

Have a great week/weekend.

Ciao ,

Aunty Pol

Wednesday, March 05, 2008

Gary Gygax

Long ago and far away..oops...wrong line there.

In 1974 , a man by the name of Gary Gygax invented a game and a new way of thinking. It was called " Dungeons and Dragons."

I have always had a penchant towards Science Fiction and Fantasy, so when I was at the college, I'd heard ad nauseum abut DND.

I was curious........and then I was hooked.

Imagine, if you will...a game you could play with what we know as real time..face to face where you could take on the personality or avatar as it were of a Mage, a Elf..

And no one laughed their ass off.

Gary Gygax gave me back the right to deam..and the period which was with out question .the worst of my life.

I have some friends that I have played a variation of DND with for more than 5 years now.

Other games I am in are still valid...and we still play. Since 1975 Y'all.

Mr. Gygax,

Wether you knew it or small game changed the world .

Thank you.

I still have my original weird shaped dice ( thank you DH) and the manuel awarded to me when I became a Game Master. For the lifelong friends that I have made..I bow before the Master.

Blessed Be

Aunty Pol.

Friday, February 22, 2008


To: The Katz

From: The Management Partnership fka Mommy and Daddy

Re: The Rules

To Whom It May Concern:

It has come to the attention of the management that there is some inequity in the day to day operations at the location commonly referred to as : " The House." This memo is an attempt to clarify some of the salient points in hopes of future harmony and good will.

1. Food: We buy it, you get it . This is a structured plan and is widely considered generous when compared to other companies. We strive for variety and are vigilant in our pursuit of quality and overall food safety. Food is not however a toy, home decor item or bargaining chip. We agree that there are times when the item does not agree with delicate feline digestion and is returned to point of sale . We only ask that it not return to the management via the bed, comforter or fresh bed linens. When you as the katz can embrace the policy of laundry, this issue will be revisited. Furthermore, " treats" are a reward, not a Bast given right . You would do well to remember that many katz in areas such as China do not get the above mentioned treats and have far poorer diets than you enjoy. Do not abuse the treat option .

2. Toys: You have a generous selection . You have a basket full of toys. Makeup brushes, pens, pencils, lipsticks and so on do not fall in this category . Toys also do not need food or water, nor do they need a bath. Soggy, smelly , icked up toys will be removed by management. In addition, fingers and toes are not toys. Putting the bitey on management is expressly forbidden. Putting the bitey on each other is not an issue for management within reason. If management has to employ the PTU and a trip to the Vet, the above sibling bitey issue will be suspended and corporal punishment is immediately mandated.

Further memo's to follow as needed.

The Management Partnership fka Mommy and Daddy .

Monday, February 18, 2008

Adventures in Shopping - NOT

Today was a complete waste at the office , considering it was a holiday we did not get....ahem ..power that be please note....we did NADA.... ziltch.

Just Sayin n All.


Um..if any of the dear readers are of the male persuasion..leave now . Go grab a beer, the remote or what ever. SU doesn't count, he lives here in a casa where his gender is greatly outnumbered .

Onward .

I told the SU that I needed to trot over to Jacque Penny tonight after work..skivvies were on sale for me. I had the coupon in my lil fist, style number for bra's..I was locked and loaded . I didn't think that the Mall would be crowded and it mercifully wasn't. Off I trot to the proper dept ...only to discover that my favorite style had been re done under another label . Fine. I am a bright woman and can figure this puppy out. I had even recently been fitted at Dillards and contrary to most of us gals , was right on the money.


Not so much.

I find a close aproximation..finally.

Bear in mind , I am a middle aged woman . I do not need the stripper model . I dont need prints, lace, spangles, froo froo or deployable air bags.

I just need a new bra with straps that do as they are told. This is not a lot to ask in my opinion. Really..not a cosmic leap . I grab my usual size and go into the room of doom. This room I have been told has aspirations of growing up and becoming the dreaded 360 degree room that Stacy and Clinton use..rumors being what they are.

Crap. Okay fine, I need a new size under this new label. Okey doke. Can do. After what seems ages, I find it sans clerk, which is not her fault, poor thing was the only clerk on duty during a bra sale for cripes sake, I felt she deserved a beer or a medal or a foot massage at least.

Huzzah..not so much.

Out of eleventy eight bazzillion bazzonga holders on display..they ONLY have two in my size..the generic most popular cheerleader who blows the whole , entire football team size.



Panties a plenty ala problem.


I need a bra that will keep the wonder twins more in the range of my ear than my elbow, and I am aware of the effects of gravity. MY desired size doen't require 3 inch padding..middle age has taken care of that quite nicely, thank you very much.

By now, I am hot, tired and just want out of the maze.

The two things I hate to shop for more than anything on God's Green are jeans and bras. When I find a pair of jeans that are the proper length, I have been known to ask the gals at Dillards how many pair they have for this size and style..I have been known to buy them all on the spot.

I told SU that one of these weekends ,I am going to go to Dillards and take the time to find what works..that I like, sale or not and buy more than 2 friggan bras.

I won't go to Vickies..I refuse to pay $50.00 for a full coverage bra..and if they are on sale..( that's gonna happen) size pffft.

Why is something so damn'd simple so friggan hard ??

Anyone ? the back...?

Have a good week.


Aunty Pol

My Oh My ..Oh MY

It always amazes me ........ The amount of censorship our local paper feels the need to maintain........since they are in fact the only game in town . I have never personally been fond of being in a one paper town for any reason , much less living there ...... and the local broohaha over F'd up Chuck is just the latest in a series of " WTF "?

I read a lot of local blogs for a variety of reasons. For the most part , because they are either so damn clever, well written or just flat out step up and say what needs to be said. Often my reasons are a combo platter of all three.

One of my local favorites is by a man by the name of Lawrence Simon. Funny dude. Cat parent, Bread Master and all around good guy. I may occasionally disagree with an opinion or two...but hey..this is a democracy and so forth.

In a recent post , Lawrence threw up a link to the Statesman..the paper of choice in Austin for you Tourista's. One of the key points in said article is the disclosure that the Chuckster got his meds from his very own Marcus Welby. Good for you , Chuck. Kept your sorry ass out of certain wards didn't it ? Bitter much..oh yeah..Just ask the Ibarra's.

Now this is where it gets good. Seems Chucksters Doc in the Box is none other than........wait....wait....wait....

Sam Seigler.

A Yup.

Hubbs of Kelly Seigler .

Who works for the Chuckster .

And wants his job.

" It's a small world after all, it's a small world after all. "

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Irony..I'd laugh but then .

I have found that as I have gotten older, I have become more selective as to what I share..throw out there to the masses as it were.

Trust issues...oh hell yeah. I have learned the truely hard way the fiction of that. I no longer post here , or anywhere else some things. I no longer burden friends with a lot of what matters to me. For those closest to me...they already know. As for the's just not appropriate...and I do not wish to give them a free pass to sit in judgement.

The irony is thus.

I am in a situation right now where the irony is that the only person who I would bring it to or I think might understand has been long gone..27 years gone.

Damn It Mother..this really sucks..I could have used your help right now.


Me asking for your help and insight...



Aunty Pol

Monday, February 04, 2008

It's 2008 ~ Lets Get Our Rant ON


We had to go to Kroger tonight, the larder had cobwebs . The kittehs were fine. The Beans needed a provision run . And it's been one of those Mondays..after stoopid bowl . We got home about tact, but dear..some one had to clean the tarte pans so that the princesses and their brudders did not snap to the fact that there was a chocolate residue....good for us , not so much for them . And I Know that you are still adjusting to the braces so you uudies hurt..yeah....welcome to my world dude .

Moving On........

So there we are. I usually give him the list , the coupons and my atm. This time I wanted to go in as the whole chiggins were on sale for .69c per lb..too cheap to pass up but I still gotta look.

We hadn't locked the car before we saw some young Momma...Ms Thang...2 kids in the buggy..third beside her hanging on to the handle...hopping his lil ass off on one foot........and her ass is on the cell phone.


Three minutes I promise you we are in the store and .." hear that ? " was the migration of the Howler Monkeys.


Run Faster

Run Some More.

WTF is wrong with you people ?

You have no concept of proper public deportment..look it up.

My mother , like you , was a single parent for long stretches , and the worst was..Daddy was deployed so she did it all. When she went to the store, or commisary that was the time she could call her own . Peace and quiet. Either the Gablers, Carrie and Earl...or Cindy Bassone ( before the divorce from John ) or Betsy Ostereicher or the older Brown sister babysat. There was always someone to tend the kids.

And don't tell me Miss Thang, that you don't have someone to do that.

That is bullshit .

And if we ever dared to act up that would have to pray that the drive home was longer than it was . Mom would never address it in public if we acted up..much less Daddy...if he was there, but BY got the look.

You have no concept of how inept you look, how pitiful the social skills , if you in fact understand the concept...that you are showing those babies.

You get what you raise...and I would like to feel sorry for you made this choice.

Hang up and be a PARENT , you Troll.

Rant over


Aunty Pol

Saturday, February 02, 2008


For once it looks like we are goign to have a lovely weekend weather wise. It's going to hit 70 degrees at least today which if nothing will help my sinus's clear up .When you are prone to sinus problems, the worst of all is the stomach issues with drainage, and any one who also suffers knows exactly what I mean here so I am not going to elaborate. Consider yourselves fortunate. I hate missing work for this kind of thing , is what it is.

It appears that the plumbing demo is not going to be quite as bad as I had imagined , thank you Jeebus. I am a glass half empty sort of gal, I know how awful that sounds, but if you imagine the worst and prepare to deal with that , you are prepared . If it's not that bad, WERE prepared for the worst so it's all good. I am grateful that we have the Moron to take care of all of this for us , we can just leave him a key, and he will do the rest. Now, it he just knew heat and A/C , ...but that is another story. I love owning a house...yes indeedy I do.

Mardi Gras was a hoot. You have to live down here to understand how important this is to all of us. We have beads out the wazzou and an invitation to ride on the Choctow ( sp) float next year..OH Hell Yeah ! We both took some of the beads into our respective offices, there are a couple of people with young daughters ..and we all know how much little girls like to play dress up , nuff said . The King Cakes went in record time, Antiones in Gretna is the ONLY place to get them from and I am sure that they have them on line, so if you ever feel the urge for nummy , sugary brain blowing Bliss...there ya go.

I woke up this morning to the house smelling like a complete chocolate factory...the good kind. The yakers are having their annual super bowl party and so hisself made two different kinds of chocolate cheese will be fun.

Have a great weekend.


Aunty Pol

Sunday, January 20, 2008

LOL....Yeah..It's like that ..

I am always suprised that unlike most people that we know, SU and I are always busier in January than the traditional Holiday Insanity .



We have pretty much moved the annual holiday dinner party permanently to January . It's just too hard to plan it for December for all of us. Work, familiy obligations,'s just too hard. Besides, January pretty much always strikes us as blah. The party itself was a smashing success, ten for dinner this year. I clean and do that crap...he works. We had to borrow a card table for this year which is still sitting in the dining room with a borrowed table cloth...( UM...SU ..what did I ask you do also do this weekend ??????????) . SU invited a co-worker and her beau..a lovely couple . The beau is from NOLA so he , the NG and the Cajun had a lot to talk about. She was raised right, and sent a lovely card and thank you gift, they will be invited again.

Then it's Mardi Gras, hisself and the Cajuns will go again of course. The Cajun has family who are in a krewe and a place to crash so they will go off. I am donating some throw down bra's for Mrs Cajun to throw...goofy girl threw a newish Vickies a few years ago..I am not letting her live that one down anytime soon. The same weekend , I have a wedding reception/party to go to for a co-worker so the other NG and I will go....Then the yakers are having their stoupid bowl party ...then who knows...? See January is packed.

On the homefront, it's been colder than a well diggers who hah here and we haven't replaced the Central Heat/Air yet, that will have to wait until Unca Sammy is paid. We did get Miss Gracie Marie ( yes dear, she HAS a middle name ) to the vet finally for her checkup/out and shots. They think ( remember Annie/Andy...yup.....same Vet) she is 2, and in fine health . She has made a habit of sleeping at the NG's in their garage and a bed of sorts was fashioned. The puppies think of her as their pet and were upset when we had her in the night before the vet trip . Soooooo, basically I paid $131.00 to share custody with the NG's which is fine...I still have to get her fixed...I might as well just poo money it seems. But, she is happy and warm and everyone is happy .

Work goes well....all in all..good at the Casa.

And, I scored John Fogarty tickets for the mid March rodeo concert.

" Put Me In Coach"...............WOO HOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have a good week....


Aunty Pol

Saturday, January 05, 2008

And So Forth

Bless his heart, Hisself knows that when I am upset , I just need to vent , hence the last posting . If you push me, poke at me or prod me when I am truely upset, I Will Rip Off Your Head And Spit down Your Neck...WERD !

We talked about all of this b.s. and revamped the master plan , and while I am not the happiest of campers, I see the logic of it all.

This is not to say that I am happy about all of this...but..yeah...I get it . I just wish these issues didn't involve a comma.

Have a great deserve know you do .


Aunty Pol

Friday, January 04, 2008

When dies this shit stop ?


I think I have to throw in the towel .


We got the estimate from the dude.

Last year our heat part of the central air /heat thingy went kaput. Living in zone 9 ( tropical) this was not large.

Fast forward.

Hiself took it upon hisself to get it checked into.

Well had the day off.......whatevs.

It seems that the heat part is kaput and according to the A/C wonk....the air part will soon follow.

Like twins separated at birth.

Question One : Why does a new friggan system not last more than 14 years ?

Question Two : Why ?

I am beyond ...whatever...

The estimate has a comma in the figure .

F savings.

And I have no idea about income tax for 07.

For those who read this and tisk tisk.." Prior Prudent Planning "

F off n die.

The taxes I can do..

I paid the prop/homeowners a week ago,,,,,,,,,,,and there was a comma.

I would cry if I had the stamina right now


Aunty Pol