Monday, July 31, 2006

Again....WHY ?


Pol here has had only about 4 hrs if this goes somewhat askew....heh heh.

Why are some people held to different standards than others ? Mel Gibson gets a DUI and goes off on a rant that is beyond distasteful. I have some questions that are whirling in the lil noggin.

1. Why the hell does this merit the press coverage it does ? More than the usual gossipy blurb on the inside of the local rags front page, this merits a third of the page 3 column entry . Again , why ?

2. Hollyweird claims that Mr. Gibson may have destroyed his career with this latest stunt. To which I reply, " Bullshit !" . His carreer will be just fine and dandy as long as his next vehicle makes a huge ass profit for one and all. To claim otherwise is so completely absurd that it defies logic. This is the way it is, was and ever shall be. Every single time some famous/infamous personna commits what many consider carreer suicide, they routinely cry " Mea Culpa " and move on to better things. Just ask Ellen Degeneres . Do you really think a major credit card company would use her in a commercial if they were so " concerned " about her gender preferrence ? I didn't think so either.

3. Don't blame the booze Mel. You may have expressed words that are so completely rude, ill thought AND just down right mean that if I was your Mother, wife or child..I'd have smacked you up side the head. The booze had very little to do with it , asshat. It did not enable your racist remarks. Your racist views are a direct projection of being a racist....period. So much for your faith sustaining you. HAH !

4. Lastly...why does anyone care that some ignorant , balding middle aged movie star open his yapper and inserts both feet ? Why does this take up space in the media to this extent ? I doubt that the police made his remarks up, after all as he claims..." He owns Malibu ." Careful Mel, my God may not be a vengeful God, but just in never know.

Kinda hard now to deny your fathers Holocost comments isn't it ?

Ironic.....I think not.

Be glad you aren't related to this prince among men . I sure am.

Have a good day...really.


Aunty Pol

Thursday, July 27, 2006

La Cage a Feline

Well gang...just when I thought it could not, nay would not get any weirder at the Casa............

Hee Hee

This past Saturday I was out on the patio ( it's only the Ice House at night when the lights are on...hope that clears THAT up ..) with " Annie" doing my usual chillin...SU and I have a couple of those funky ass canvas and metal framed chairs courrtesy of the neighbor gals....and Annie like to sleep in one like it's a hammock....on her back. There I was giving her head noogies and chin rubs when I look towards her feet...and OMG......She's a HE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

ROTF ..I kid all y'all not.

There he was in all his glory........To say that I freaked out would be the understatement of the year. That's like saying Andrea Yates was just having a " bad day". I just was stunned. I didn't say anything to SU as he would really wonder about his wifey poo....and the following day had almost convinced myself that it was one of those really vivid dreams .

Monday after work, as per norm, he went out to feed " Annie ". He then picked her/him up and was holding her/him in his arms like a bebe...on his/her back. I prance out there and grab a lil footie and ask..." Honey..whazzat "? He almost dropped the cat. Having verified that I am not insane......we both realize that ANDY .

All of a sudden it dawn on us...the huge feet...the fearlessness with the NG's puppies.....the fact that the ladies of the Casa were curious and yet Loki hissed at him.......Wegotsababyitsaboy.

The larger issue is........WHY THE F DIDN'T PETSMART SEE THAT WHEN THEY HAD HIM/HER IN SURGERY LAST MONTH TO NEUTER ???????????????????????????

I'm serious people ! Why didn't the Vet notice ? It's true that at the time , Andy wasn't old enough to have visible evidence of said equipment....but really people....this is a bit much.

His Daddy is going to deal with them, because we still have to have him fixed.

If Momma goes in there, I am mad enough to strip paint off the walls. No...I won't cuss but I will verbally eviscerate them.

Count on it.

PS A Big Tejas Shout Out to you know who for the better title.

Have a good day.....really....go for it.


Aunty Pol

Monday, July 17, 2006

It's a Monday Here Gang

I hads to laugh last night as SU and I watched the umpteenth remake of a movie...this time " King Kong." Now don't get me wrong, I am as much in favor of a good action flick as the next person...but the end of the 3 hour tour..oops film...I am going Woo Hoo...go Monkey go Monkey....heee heeee..driving SU right outta the room.

Mission accomplished.

Just heard they are proposing a re-make of " Cool Hand Luke."

That is just wrong peeps............WRONG ! WRONG ! WRONG ! WRONG !

Had the usual blah weekend. Pulled all of the Mexican Heather out of the beds, crowding my roses so we all know that I will be pulling that shit forever more. Annie has discovered the delights of chasing the water from the sprinkler. " Run , Zoom, somemore..oh wait..that is fun....wheeeeeeeeeee...look Momma....!!!!!!!!! What's that in your mug ? Coffee ? Um...what's that ? Face in mug....Bleech. Funny Kitteh.

SU and Moron and the usual co-horts played goof yesterday. That is not a typo btw...the way they play it at times....goof. At least SU has the common sense to limit the beer when the heat index is 105. Yeah for Gatoraide. Less could be said for the Moron. But that's his wifey poo's problem . Remember..Mrs. Moron is the rocket scientest who said that she was going to sue Woodrows..aka the office for putting a fire hydrant in their parking such an inconvenient place that she backs over it...fubaring her van thus denying her the pleasure of being part of the evac line on the freeway outta H town last summer with Katrina and such....I am not kidding here peeps. There is a reason I can her other half the Moron .

It's a Monday all right. Not that I had any particular high hopes for the's hotter than ...wait for it.........Satans Underoos for $200.00 Alex...and I l knows by the end of the day that I WILL have a migraine . I have taken the meds..but there are some days they don't work . Sigh..oh crap..sorry..need to send Brudder e mail...sigh.

Have a great day....really...try it.


Aunty Pol

Friday, July 14, 2006

What in the Who ??????????????????????

I normally don't pay more than a second thinking about all of the weirdness that endears this city to my evil little brain....really..I don't.


I've been trying to get the little gray cells wrapped about the recent comments of Rev. Bill Lawson. I am sure that his daughter, Melanie ( I am NOT a Diva) Lawson is some where in town , clutching a double de-fat latte moaning " Oh dear Gawd ..Daddy just stop "

You see the normally articulate Reverend Lawson is exhibiting symptoms of a blow to the head in his remarks at Ken Lay's memorial service . Reverend Lawson compared Kenny Boy to ( in no particular order) ..

1. Dr. King

2. Jesus

3. JFK

4. James Byrd,Jr.

" They were vilified in life but became heroes in death " .

A direct quote.

WTF ????????????????????????????????

For those pondering the identity of James Byrd, Jr....

Mr . Byrd had the unfortunate condition of being black. Now before you all rear up at me ...let me finish...m'kay ?

Mr. Byrd was the man in Jasper , Texas who was abducted by three thugs, chained to the back of a pick up truck and dragged until his body parts were scattered. Apparently , the only thing about Mr. Byrd that offended the three " gentlemen" was the fact that he was black.

To compare the king of the Robber Barons to the victim of a lynching is beyond absurd . It is a slap in the face of humanity and added insult to the Byrd family.

Rarely have I ever been so nauseated .

Gonna be a long day kids.

Aunty Pol

Tuesday, July 11, 2006

If I beat my head on my desk , will Workman's Comp cover it ?

After all the fun yesterday, I thought surely today would be better....yeah..I admit it . The air quality down here is pure La La Land. I guess this beats all of the rain that we've been having and SIL..I swear I would send you some if I could ...honest hon . But the headaches are just the same...daily pounding , incessant sinus kick your ass headaches . Now before any one suggests going to Marcus Welby, hold up . Been there. Done that. Trust me here. ANY one who knows me , knows how I feel about F'g Dr's . The only time I have ever gone willingly is back when I broke my wrist and elbow in a fantastic display of grace ala marble floors. I suspect that underlying the agony of that trip in the Nissan was the purely selfish hope of some really good meds. " Oh ." And of course it was a double hairline fracture of both wrist and elbow which could not be casted . Between my left hip and right arm , I'M A WALKING TALKING BAROMETER ~! Given that I live in an area that watches the Gulf and knows when the really bad part of the 'cane sesason's more fun than watching paint dry ..Har.

So take one daily dose of Desi Arnaz playing Babaloo key no less ..add a neurotic attorney in deposition and this is pretty much my day thus far. I like the attorney in question, but he gets himself so wound up that he does it to himself. " Yes Sir...I can get this copied for you . " " Lunch Order Sure .." " Why do I need a list of the attorneys and their sides and the client/witness ?" " Well Sir...I'd rather not have you ream my ass out in your stridently fundamentalist way if I can help it, and I am sure you can understand why Attorneys from that other joint might want to be seperated from our clients/expert witnesses. Yes, Mr Wound To Tight has a assistant but she poor thing also has 2 or 3 associate bebe attorneys , a paralegal in addition to MR . WTT .

And then there is the fact that ol Pol here has been here since the Punic Wars and these Yutz's know that I know what to do , when to do it, how to do it and where to hide the corpse. OF course such ability is never recognized. Why would it be , when we the indentured are so profoundly grateful of the 3 % raise we get annually. Plus the summer bonus...taxed of course.

Usually I have the good graces to be aware of my fortunes, and yes I did go through a month of hell in April with SU and that fiasco. And I am grateful that the summer bonus paid for Munchkins dental I blog here n there and remind myself of my daily Mantra :

" We live in a democracy, we do not work in one."

Now , where the hell is that Voodoo Doll I have....hee hee

Yes..I really have one.

You can't be suprised , can you ?

Home's official ...we are weird. SU is in the kitchen baking from scratch cookies. Watching a program on PBS..Einstein and Quantum ( sp..whatever) Mechanics and I am here. Spent the usual hour with the orphan on the patio. Gave the puppies next door their treats..and of course Madame had to have one. I won't tell her they are dog treats if all y'all don't.....shhhhh.
LMAO ROTF..he brought her home and I am the one that spends time with her every night after work and on the weekends.

All y'all saw that one coming didn't ya..go ahead , admit it. I think it's a hoot. She will bite him , but not her sir..I don't think so.

Have whatever the hell day/evening you want...I'm having Jack Daniels .

Aunty Pol.

Monday, July 10, 2006

Oh Jeebus H ....It's a Monday and then some

The very last friggan thing I personally need on a Monday is some yahoo photographer up here in my face setting up his Jimmy Olson cub reporter gear.....waiting for some of our " demure " attorneys to assemble for mug shots.


First of all.....people's a monday . Why in the name of all things sacred did you decide to do this on a Monday. Half you lot are busy borrowing my visine because you simply HAD to watch the world cup. LIKE YOU F'G Care.....Not ! This is for ad space that we probably paid for in Texas Lawyer . How modest of us . We cannot keep decent associate here ( I miss you Marlon ) and the staff attitude is...well....look up attitude...but we can waste time and money over this bullshit.............GAH . Oh shit....hee hee...Jimmy Olson is now giving directions that sound like the hokey pokey...this is insanely funny now..or the migraine meds are kicking in..your pick. Hee


Another week of rain..god I don't know if I can take much more. The SIL says that they need it up yonder when she lives and if I could I would send her some.....It's great for the yard...the hydra's love it and Annie is adjusting to being a flying Wallenda...for an out door Kitteh she certainly has become the " Feetsies Wet...Oh Hell No " kinda kitteh..LOL..

CAN WE GO HOME NAOW ?????????????????????????????????????????????

Wednesday, July 05, 2006

The Ultimate Irony

Well kids, just when I think I can't be surprised anymore..............yup. Breaking news that former Enron robber Baron Ken Lay died of a heart attack in Aspen Colorado was a jaw dropper. First of all, the confirmation that he actually had a heart was noted...then the irony that he managed to survive the trialapalooza here in town and hit the big dirt nap out of state was food for more than a bit of thought. Here in H Town we will prepare for the media juggernaut that is looming as the " Media" swarms in to cover all of the varied reactions. I am charitable enough to feel for Ken Lay's family, I know what it is to lose a father . But I can bet with a Certainty that he went the opposite direction that my late, beloved Father did . And there is some justice in that.


Happily Ms. Munchkin did well with her dental surgery ....$$$$$$$$ not so bad and she has yet to do the sneezies since . I really think that she didn't have allergies as much as the problems that can happen with sinus's and teeth problems . Makes sense that it could happen in felines as well as humans.....and I speak from literal experience. The rest of the feline front is happy also to note that she did return after being carted off in the " Box of Death " as SU and I dubbed the cat carrier. Yes it's morbid , but it helps get through those times when the ticket is one way and your heart is broken. At least I can save on the new scars that come with trying to force a pill down Munchkins throat . Miss Annie is the Queen of Sheba on the patio with her condo and has been introduced to the wonders of catnip.....everybody wang chung tonite ! She has gotten used to the rain at this point which is fortunate as we are going to have it all week. Sigh....oh the headache's will be plenty...I can feel it already.


I don't know about anybody else but I was perfectly happy to have a rainy 4'th of July. TNT ran a full day marathon on " Law and Order" , and wonder of wonders...some of the eps were new to Moi. Now I remember why I loved that damn'd show so much.....RIP Jerry Orbach. The rain also reduced the amount of fireworks that the little terrorists in our neighborhood could set off. Now don't get me wrong...I love a good fireworks display .....but not at 2 friggan a.m. You can 't throw a rock up or down FM 1960 and not hit a fireworks stand. I am especially impressed with the logic of putting up said fireworks stands at the gas station. I always envision that scene in the Birds where Tippy Hedron and others try to tell the moron at the gas station not to light his smoke while standing in gasoline . Heh ! The problems with the firecrackers et. al is that usually down here we are hot and dry enough by the 4'th that the fire hazzard is a real issue. Especially with those scrubby ass east Texas Pines that you cannot excape...oh well. And where the Hell in the TV schedule did the powers that be list " Yankee Doodle Dandy ?" I don't have many taditions , but some are set in stone. IF it's Christmas , I HAVE to watch "White Christmas ." IF it's the 4'th of July , I HAVE to watch " Yankee Doodle Dandy ." Period....not negotiable....step away from the remote dear . I don 't mess with you during the Ryder Cup do I ? Mess with me and that too will change.

Have what ever the Hell kinda day you want to .....really...this ones on me.


Aunty Pol