I've been going back and forth for a day or more on the wisdom of posting this.
In the end, I remembered how just the act of it helped me the tougher times and that this blog is if nothing else my stress reduction tool.
I have suppressed the feeling that was actually my intuition , hoping that I was wrong or over thinking it all.
I hate it when I am right.
Don't laugh, I can hear you .
Stay with me here...this is not my usual smart ass post.
Both of us have been afraid that when Mother came home that the old patterns would start again.
That she would stop eating more than a bite or two at any given time and then proceed to play with her food like a three year old attempting to fake all the adults out.
She was not doing this in the hospital. They gave her meds to stimulate her appetite and she took them.
She gained a pound or two...remember this is an 80 year old cancer/cardiac patient who weighs 108 lbs.
Not my guess-timation....the data on the hospital records.
Will she take them at home ?
OH HELL NO .
Yes...it's that simple and that obvious.
As far as I am concerned , this is passive suicide .
And out of courtesy, I am only going to say that my husband is at a loss.
His feelings are his own and not appropriate for me to share here, not until I have his permission.